For what is training

Right so long since i posted , cos now, ha i (or rather my dad) fixed the comp, so it doesnt have so many problems.





Life is , training. Nothing else.





This holidays, despite promises to be active in church more, to study more, they don't seem to count for anything. Training.



Round Ubin came and went, of which i sank and returned. Then comes another endless routine of long distance training for the upcoming Canoe Marathon. And its , taking its toll. Losing the idea of studying in JC , sometimes i wonder what am i doing here for. Losing the idea of training, and i wonder... Why do i train for.



Why do i do things but give it up in future to replace with another impulsion interest.

Kept sane by the constant companionship of teammates, that otherwise, oh my, i realise i dun have anything else.



So now we resist anything that tries to disturb the stability of the team bond, that included those unfortunate incidences, which well, ultimately goes out to a selfish purpose.

Its not about running away from difficulties, but there's just so much that could be done in its face.



Ok fine that would just mean we'll have to move on.





Training~~~~~



Aye long dist training just means i'm left forever to chase people in front. And that what i;ve been doing, other than keeping people from chasing up to you. Thats just like any race.

Time trials, well, satisfying, but not contented.



Ahh losing track of time, since which is which training session did each event occur i cant remb.



Lets just say the Christmas break is something worth looking out for...

Can't be strangers

Right so now just came back from a real eventful day.

Morning whizzed past fast in the Pasir Ris SSC , waiting for people, then more waiting for coach, before getting to real work doing boat maintainence on site.

Then only did we got down to test the water conditions at the Pasir Ris coastline.
Yes and i empahisize the coastline, because we never got to go out any further then the coastline region.
Wave condition, i would put it, to be something like having a lot of powerboats doing endless power runs past our boats. MOreover, these K2s and K1s are flatwater sprinting boats, and when put into choppy conditions as bad as these, we never got a chance to paddle proper strokes.

Took a K1 out, since coach refused to put out our K2 in those conditions, but the session lasted barely 30 mins, for fear of damaging the equipment. Yeah the tapping strokes had to be so frequent and hard, i thought my blade wouldn't last out. Being bullied by metre tall waves, yes they were at least a metre from trough to crest, and when sitted down in the kayak, they overshadow you.

Bedok <>

You could never hope to have conditions like that in a reservoir. And we may yet to need to abandon the race tmrw if conditions doesnt change for the better. So much for the long distance trainings.
BUt then again, it was real fun riding the waves using sprint kayaks. The bow could angle down all the way till the water line was at the cockpit combing, and the next wave would literally crash into our small little boats, utterly flooding the interior.

Heck, i would have gladly paid the $20 race fee just to come here and play with the water. Hehz



After that was a period of transition, while i went over to Mark's house for a reunion outing of PAE 07s07 .. Yupps no doubt it was as usual round of talking, a closer bonding session. And its always have to be that after we parted then do we treasure the bonds we once had. Nevertheless, it wasn't awkward at all, since everyone still pretty retained the bonds shared.

Eating junk foods just one day before race is a sin, something i might have to foot the consequences.
And to add on the the carnage, MArk brought out his private stash of citrus vodka and whatever cocktail mix was that. Since it was quite a first time had I hanged out with friends in the presence and availabilitiy of liquor, I thought I might as well take the opportunity and try it out. Wouldn't hurt i guess...

Thus i downed till I flushed red, it wasnt a lot , just a small plastic cup of that vodka , and the cokctail milk mix, enough to make me start smiling senselessly, followed by a headache i couldnt help but drop onto the table while the rest of them continued talking.

A short rest nap on the couch while some played cards did help to soothe the whirling...

And for once, i decided to return home voluntarily on taxi.

Hence ended this little outing we had, since Arun is leaving for Aust soon, make do for a little farewell party for him then.

The bonds we once shared, may it last till. Yet i'm quite surprised the time span since we met didnt degrade us to the awkwardness amongst strangers, that is.

28 Nov 2007

The morning started off on a rather low note, late for training despite flying down on a cab, yeah and that’s just the start of a chain reaction that kinda wrecked the training session for me at least. Being late, given a talking, punished 300 push ups then I got to rushing around getting my own equipment ready, then rushing all the way to fill up the water bag only to have it leak half its contents out because I didn’t cap it properly in the rush.

OK there goes my recovery drink. Hastily started out, with no warm up since everyone was already done with it and waiting.
The 500m up and down sets at high power didn’t do much good, since right at the start I burned out , not being able to fully utilize all that I got, and becoming more and more demoralized with each passing set. Until the fact I regretted going for more, save that supposed to be more practice and more training, it did only to make me more down and use even lesser strength. There you have the power of the mind, but then, I was completely off the mood for training.

True I could blame a lot of factors; the bad morning start off, lack of energy, the strong up winds, the lack of a warm up, people cutting lanes etc etc.

Ultimately it comes to the knowledge that, hey , its just I allowed those to take the negative impact on me. Its not about how badly they will do, hell you cant blame the devil trying to disrupt your life; that’s just his job.
What you could do is protect yourself against him. That’s where I failed, that’s where during training, I allowed myself , for that moment, to wallow in self pity and the “ its-not-fair-for-me” mindset. Yes, and that’s where I have to take responsibility for, and the price is a wasted training session, just mere days before the Ubin race.



That’s just one of the bad stuff that has to happen. On a higher note the day had much excitement brewing in its bowels. Hanged around after training, wasted some time before heading over to Queensway to collect the new jerseys and thereafter, headed on to Qian’s or rather her brother’s chalet to hijack it for the night.

Took some time settled down and played our night away.

Finding it a first time , know that really, there wasn’t really much to make of one’s birthday. Not that it really mattered, because, for the past years, its all been just as normal as any other day. Maybe the dinner would be better, but that’s just about it anyway.

But since, this time I wasn’t spending it at home. And I really do mean it when I say it was really a surprise, the way it was brought forth. Even though I didn’t really make a lot out of it, but yeah, I really do appreciate that.


THANKS TEAM … that ‘lil gesture meant a lot … Hehz



And hence continued the night away, playing cards till late late into the night until one by one the people collapsed, those who did so early got the best rooms and beds, those who didn’t made do on the floor, with stolen pillows and blankets and towels ..










29 Nov 2007


Right spent the early morn slacking, allowing this bit of enjoyment outside of training , that which comes so rarely.

Towned and watched “The Kingdom” , something which touched about the terrorism issues in the middle east, one of those shoot-em-up movies that probably worth watching only on TV. OK I shan't spoil too much, but then again there’s just that something I felt most about the movie.

Those who watched it will know, like when the head villian was dying, something he whispered to his granddaughter, very much similar to how the female lead was comforted upon the knowledge of the death of her close friend. A promise that “we will go kill them all” .

Kind of put to thinking that, its really alarming how vengeance can comfort. Yes it is saying that the thought of revenge, of violent retribution can serve as a motivation for life which is quite something which happens in the world today.

Kinda disappointing to find out that the ending has to end so negatively, in a note to say that actually glamorizes violence. I was expecting the director to put in something like “ Don’t worry life still goes on” , or , “ Its ok there’s still hope” kind of message to include when character faced the death of a loved one.

Then again, its just this world that’s going about it. Go find any Doomsday talk in any religion and you find that it says that THE END comes preceded with a period of mass violence, moral degration and the likes of it.
Who’s to say the world’s going to last forever?




And hence after got back to Bedok to train illegally with TP, and since it became like a self training session with not much of a program in place, I went on with my own 500m sets while Eugene goes for his rounds.

Same kind of feeling , reminiscence of the A divs race again, using the same boat, same paddle, same lanes, but a much different me. A different feeling though, no one’s looking, no one expecting much, no stress, no competition, just a maxx effort in the the sprint. Taking revenge for the lost training the day before, and the last time trial which went so horribly wrong for me. Hmm lets just say I’m playing around for now ..


Back then when the race meant so much for all that I fought for. As I paddled down I was thinking, hey its just how much u really want for it, that kind of dissatisfaction that pushes you to fight even harder.

Because I was dissatisfied then, being left out of the PA championship race in June wasn’t quite the way I intended to be. So I fought, for every training, for every bit of time I get to practice with the K1. The passion to win, not the actual race, but the fight to get to participate in the A Divs in July was that overwhelming factor.

I fought , and hence , qualified me to say, I got what I fought for. And its this kind of self training that allows the active exploration of skills learnt, and putting it to practical use. So for once, at least it was worth the while.

Messed up with time

Disorientation of the sense of time sets in when the routine comes and goes weekly, and more often than not, attempts to summarise them only end up with fragements of memories that has no time or date stamp. That or otherwise, I only remember vaguely what happens, but not when did it happen.

Well ok there it goes, because most of it is just about training and more training, and the sessions comes so intertwined i cant remember when's when and how's how.
And since its more than mid way through NOvemeber, it just wont do to have nothing to write about as a keepsafe for looking back and this great part of time. Well essentially its just a time when we training the hardest, or do we , the longest, since time is just at its highest rate of abundance.

NO work for me this hols so far, not like the past few years when i squandered my year end breaks in the bookshop in exchange for some xtra cash. NOt that i'm looking forward to it, but this years means i wont get to have anything much to spent for personal indulgences.

Fine, maybe its still too early to say. Qian's got herself some time off to teach tuition for the quick buck. Time to rethink my stance?



Training .... Yes thats something that occupies the bulk of my brain and physical capacity. So far we are all training for Dec's ROund Ubin race. Right so its juz long dist and more long dist , having changed K2 partners countless times to try out., the otehr day. YEah since i prefereed to be back rower, relinquishing the task of having to control rudder, focussing more on the awareness of the situation and providing the bulk of the engine force.

Ceyong dumped me for korky , and thereafter left for OCIP so theres no really another way to reconcillate it in the short term . Not with Tzet and Nelson; our pairing just don't work out well . Jonn is too obseessed with Nic to agree to swap partner. RS would work if only he was straight, (oops and i do mean if he could keep the boat moving straight ) . GJ needs more practice with the K1 first ; no time to learn the harshness of long D drafts.

That leaves me no one left to pair with, and since i wasnt really looking forward to pay $20 to let the K1s win , i was contend in being left out of the Ubin race team for this once , focussing more in K1 until a suitable occasion. Till recently , coach was to put me up behind him so as to go the race as the second drafting K2 to go with Nic& Jonn ...

Which leads to today's training, quite slack , xept that i was a bit stressed with the thought of having coach as the partner. Fine provided it took him longer to warm up, as he claimed, so we took off easily for rounding the reservoir with Jack on the left and Jonn being in the LiangJin on the right, since Nic was sick.

A fine start, and easy forward, and worked out well. Maintaining at relatively low speeds of about 10 km/h according to the GPS speedometer on board jack's boat. and that was already quite slacky, Jack having the cheekiness to complain that it was too slow and slack despite Jonn and Wai Kit struggling to keep up .

Wai kit fell back right from the start, Jonn beat up to about 2.5 km before making a spectacular exit from the draft formation by capsizing.
After that, it became routine again. Long distance and being back rower, heh i would admit i was pretty much providing only brute force and little technical work save for the balance. Fine maybe thats my kind of contribution.




Open house came and went, and it wasnt as a blast as i was to think it might be . Maybe its just this time of the year and the lack of publicity. Whatever it was, the little bit of efforts we did for it, like the cam-whoring session at the pontoon after one of the trainings , so as to get some presentable pics to show off for.

And we tried to initiate Operation: Jonn Gan approach C**** , which pivotal point ended up on a bottle of half drank mineral water. OK fine inside joke... HAHA

Oh if I may add , GJ wasnt let off as well ...

Right ok thats as much as i would want to say. Will try to be a little more consistent and keep those promises made to myself . OK fine that wasnt necessasry

Think more ahead

29-10-2007
Mon 1138 pm




Right so now it’s a long over due post that gonna have to summarise my past week .
Plenty of things that so intermixed I dunno how to start recalling .


Right from somewhere the past week did we start working on the OP right after the WR was submitted, which was right after the Promos ended, which was after who knows how many weeks spent mugging , so much that now I’m losing track of the past .

KK recallll ~~…..

Separate issues … Training first ..

Mon and Tues was two consecutive gym sessions that was basically insanely programmed but yet so satisfying because finally I reach a point where I myself voluntarily dun want to gym further for those days. Yeah talk about breaking thru muscle limit.
Followed by more long dist paddling and drafting sessions with the K1 , alternating that and the short C1 session , after that and all , thoroughly wreaking havoc thru the body.

The indicator came at Wed night, thurs morn when I got one of those what superstitious folks call it the “bei gui yah” or “ being squashed by ghost” … Scientifically speaking, its just something to do with the over exhaustion of the muscle that immobilizes it during sleep.

That as during the late A.M when I jolted up of sleep to feel the whole body dysfunctional, yeah and key thing is only the body is dysfunctional, my mind came fully conscious, but my body wouldn’t react to attempts to move. And man did that felt real, I about realized the situation as soon, and serious I wouldn’t blame those folks for thinking its ghost squashing me.
It felt like someone was pinning u down and cant move, no nerves would work, no muscle would move. Scary at first, but what an interesting experience it was, like being jailed in ur own body with ur mind functioning perfectly and looking at the world on a third person point of view thru ur very own eyes.


Thurs after a bloody slakcy day with only chem Lect being the only attraction, was spent working endlessly on PW … And since A LOT of pple ponned, mine being the only group that’s at full strength , work wasn’t really productive, and with aline suggestion of a dance for OP , even less practical work was done.

Slacked with the class after that , with most of the guys absent, and esther Kelly and the Chinese pple gang opting to go k-box , which didn’t entice me, and since I wasn’t going to go singing with all girls and me the only guy.

In the end left me , WS , Valerie and the TJ gang in class, so for once I decided to break out and join them which was perceived to be the “class” since no one else was left.
Went PS to pizza , then hanged out and Istana Park and the starbucks. And woots its really been long since I could laze out at town with frens doing nothing in particular , that was back in PAE times ..

Time really is airborne huh, J1 is over airhead … Not really ready to accept that fact, and since time had been hard pressed over the months, I realized I didn’t really spent a lot of time with the class. And hence now this opportunity came just in time.




Friday’s farewell assembly for Mrs Lim the Principal was really an eye opener, yeah though somehow I dun have much of contact with her, its kinda pity to see her retire, this goes to proof, parting is never good to bear,

If my enemy parts I’m gonna miss him too hah

Also from that assembly got me hooked on to the song “Canon Rock”, which I later got JK to send to me and got me on the line with the song.

Fri’s training was pulled forward to 1230, for the staff meeting, and was kinda slacky
But now I really have to work a lot more on pull-ups
Can’t let the numbers drop further.. 12 is disgusting right

PS again with the team after training, and its lazing again, since there was nothing much on the agenda, and Qian wanted to buy slippers to replace hers that was bitten by monkeys the other day at bedok. (Oh yeah did I mentioned my specs were stolen my those monkeys too?)




Sat K1 time trial is shit to the extreme for me at least… Maybe for the rest you all would’ve broken more better timings, but for me … Haiz

Didn’t even get to start off much, hastily lined up after the earlier group, seeing the extended red buoy in my direct path but have no time to go for another pass of lining up again. Thinking that I could push it aside later …
And Eugene started us off unconventionally, and I opted for a left stroke start to make room for the small buoy …

First stroke, then second, the third again on the left, and my whole left blade got caught up with the cable cord of the buoy marker and tangled. IN the momentum of the start, I felt the tug of the tangle but ignored it to go for the fourth stroke thinking I could shake it off.

BY the time I went for the fifth on the left again, the whole blade was hopelessly twined by the cord. Struggled a bit forth to get loose, but the inertia from the sudden stop threw me ahead and side off and capsized, that’s barely five metres from the starting line.!!! Freaking hell! … Whatever happened on was history and I dun wanna talk about it … Haiz

BUt now after the talk with coach, i might just end up forgo on C1 afterall , not that i have no interst, but the current focus is the A divs next year, and i dun think theres enough time to go for round Ubin race and the NAtional MArathon next year and still keeping up with the C1 practice. I really come to a point that i would have to make a decision and choose . for the better of the future, unless something intervenes in the decision. That is the way i have to make do with ...

One more Ending

Ha

And we have the end of our promos exam , with the results pouring back in our faces , some good , most bad ... I think us as 07 S04 is going to face a drop in membership by next year, given how Jk and Nig are responding to the plight landed in. SHit , and shit big time ...

Bad things aside , the week was started with the very dramatic INterhouse rugby games at school. A certain twist added to it , not quite what was expected, but in itself, much more. Enjotyable , though its heck tiring in the midst of a game.
The short pre game clinic and practice and teambuilding served a great deal in getting the teams of noobs in line, setting tactics right and getting the blurness out of everyone. Venn has an awfully undermanned squad , compared to the other house whose reserves seemed neva ending.
MAtch starts , being that in the water logged field , playing prop , getting all those blunt of the scrums, lineouts , and messy rugs , but freeing me up from the task of breaking through and content on chasing and tackling pple.
Right but since when Rugby sevens' allowed such a job scope ... Ran like mad up and down the field , pushing and jumpng and chasing...

Real fun though , and come to think of it , that would have been my sport had i made the choice when i entered school.

But chill, Canoeing is great too ... Too deep in to want to backout, and having no obvious reasons to look away but to focus on my own sport . That, being the point, but no harm enjoying the essence of others ... heh







Coming straight to today, in the morning chapel service , had David Chong leading the supposed worship session , but ending feeling like old Sunday school kids.
A different perspective, bringing the memories of more the real Sundays schools attended more then ten plus years ago. Simple , and sweet.

Who said Christian worship had to be cliched and flamboyant?

True we see the genres of music develope thru ages, rock and metal seems to be the in thing for youths, but looking at the quieter side of one, a low hymn serves it purpose as well as it did generations ago.
Like wise , a guitar or a piano would have been enough ... much proven by the chapel session this morning.
heh now it makes me regret not having start learning piano when i had the chance in pri 1 ... haiz , too late , too little,
BUt hey knowing the guitar is great too ...

Little things in life to keep optimism .....




And something happened this week that made me wanna rethink my stand , my intentions for the future , short and long term alike ... Maybe its cos i'm too stubborn to change. Its not all about the face to give up , but maybe , ...... just so happens ... its time to let go ...

Freedom of another kind

Woots


And exams are over , in a whizz that blurred our lives wholesale into unspeakables . Yes it was hard to bear, but to relive that moment again , studying cramming and making the best out of what little time we had , taught me a lesson in life.

Then again , there are times when all is put to the test for that ...

Beyond the exams , BLOODY HELL i lost my Graphing Calculator !!!!

OK fine , it may not be hurting that much , but hey , that is a reminiscence of once which i lost my wallet before. Oh yeah those were the days really i lived on by raw faith.
God forbid , but it feels just the same, another test of faith then challenges how long can u last in believing God Himself to intervene and put it back to you.

Faith, or simply believing, something i lack so much after so much has happened.

Almost sounding cliched, but really m its been quite sometime since attending sun svc or CGM ... Then again some ask: WHY BOTHER ?

I say : " I 've come to learn that I cant live without."

WITHOUT GOD ...




Oh yeah for that matter, the other time i lost my wallet, i managed to get it back one whole month later, when all hope has fallen down. That true test of faith ... Wow

1/10/07 1246 AM



Its right here again, standing at the threshold of yet one more start of another exam. Getting numbed by the mindless acts of digesting notes and creating new ones, innovative tricks to help get hard data instilled into the mind.
Its not about the the hardship, for always , in all things that have passed, there’s this tinge of laughter to be enjoyed if you’re at least keeping positive.

Yes the school canteen is hot and stuffy and boring, but its also the place where the hearts and minds of students do blend in. Devouring not food but heaps of paper, working late into the night. And with the right group of people, to understand each other more deeply. You know it, and its everywhere.

JE is far , but it served as a alternative during the weekends.

Safe to say , for this exam break it had been rather eventful, or eventless. Guilt riddened with the lack of exercise since training got cut prematurely, excessive gym-ming, and the bonds forged and the bonds broken. Marking an end to another chapter of our teenage life, right when would you ever get another chance to study for another promos exam … (Unless you get … whoops … )


Also you see what a lot of people took the chance of this lull since almost every CCA is suspended. I wont need to explain .. There’s KY from the team , and other random pple like KH, and so heard a lot of others from 4-2 like shawn felix clement got it too ahhh … too much irrelevant info.. .




Chemistry is knocking at the doorstep, economics threatens to tear my future, Math is like a ever relentless female dog , physics loses its appeal …
Shit let this never be a day I regret…


Which is worse, to go in an exam hall unprepared, or to study all day long for an exam that will never come ? Despite all , I choose the latter.

Darn promos ….